20 March 2007

Set Fire to the Arcade Fire

Don’t get me wrong; I like the Arcade Fire just fine. It’s just that in the media blitz that accompanied the release of their latest album, I’ve been seeing a lot of publicity stills of the band in the newspapers, magazines and online publications of which I am so fond. And, in addition to the Arcade Fire’s dress code, which can be best described as “Mennonite pallbearer,” I’ve noticed something.

Look at the red-headed guy. The one with the slack jaw. The one who always has to be doing something slightly and ever so self-consciously different from his more somber bandmates. His name is Richard Reed Parry (Three names! How very bookish and intellectual!). Li’l Ricky seems to think he looks adorable and quirky when he poses this way, but he just looks like an inbred geek. Sure, he’s in the Arcade Fire, but that makes it even more annoying, if that’s possible.

Like in the picture above. It’s as if the photographer said, “OK, everybody look at the camera – except you, Howdy Doody. I want you to stare distractedly into the middle distance so that everybody who sees this photo will know what a special little snowflake you are.”

Every time I see one of these images, I want to beat this fucktard with a crowbar until blood is coming out of his ears – and even then, I bet he’d still have that doofus expression on his face.

Of course, if Ricky really is retarded or something, I’ll feel bad.


Skip James said...

He looks like Napoleon Dynamite. I bet his favorite animal is a liger.

Anonymous said...

Personally I think Richard is one of the coolest guys on the planet so, just shut up.

Anonymous said...

Wow, aren't you an ignorant little shit. Look you figured out how to use sarcasm.

Vitamin J said...

Hey, anonymous, I sincerely and genuinely want you to go fuck yourself.

egw said...

What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you seriously have nothing better to do?